Ribbon Road
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: Ribbon Road is much more different than it appears to be. Is it a sea full of presents with one lone red ribbon road, or is it a toy land filled with toys and different colored ribbons beyond the eye can see?
1. Ribbon Road

_Ribbon Road, 2001_

"Man... look at all those presents..." Toad stated as he and Princess Peach Toadstool looked at all the different colored and alternate sized present boxes that populated the Ribbon Road. "You ever wonder what was in them?"

"Honestly... no." Peach stated as she had her arms wrapped around the back of her heads. "I just figured that it was clothing and wrapping paper. So I never bothered to go and try opening them."

"Well, they have to be hiding something." Toad commented as he tilted his head to the right, his arms folded together. "I mean, why would anyone keep them close, unless they have a present fetish?"

* * *

_Ribbon Road, Present Day_

Ribbon Road was full of racing action as all sorts of different characters were present. Toadette and the girl, pink haired Animal Crossing human villager were zipping around at the front in 150cc, with Dry Bowser following them in a grey Mercedes car.

"Those two really are addicted to this place... and I can't figure why...?" Dry Bowser murmured to himself as he glided through the air.

"It's because this place is bright, colorful, and adorable!" Isabelle squealed as she twirled around, riding in a blue teddy bear ATV as she passed Dry Bowser, both of them landing on the red ribbon road and continuing to race.


	2. A Bouncy Ribbon

Ribbon Road was extra bouncy today, as the ribbon road itself was springing up with life, causing some of the racers to have problems as they went bouncing in the air.

"I know this place has ribbons everywhere, but this is ridiculous!" Toad exclaimed as he fell out of his blue pipe framed kart, landing on the bouncing ribbon road as he screamed for help.

"Oh no! Toad!" Toadette exclaimed as she was riding a green scooter, trying to grab Toad when she bounced into a red fake Item Box, flipping out of control as she fell off her scooter, being bounced into the air as well.

Dry Bowser and Mario watched from one of the castles populating the toy themed course, turning to each other.

"Is it always like this?" Dry Bowser asked, folding his arms.

Mario just shook his head as he let out a loud sigh. "Believe it, it gets even more chaotic..."


	3. Dough He Missed

Ribbon Road had no racers present as Toad and Toadette were both wandering around the toy kingdom, with Toadette's stomach growling as Toad turned to the pink clad mushroom girl.

"So, uh, you think they would have any sweets here?" Toad asked as he moved his arms around.

Toadette glared at Toad, her arms wrapped around her rumbling belly. "Gee Toad, what do you think? This is a lay full of toys!"

Toad was going to comment, when he got smacked by Wario riding in a Wiggler ATV, being sent into the air.

"WA HA HA!" Wario laughed as he shook his big fat butt at the two mushroom kids. "No one expects WARIO! Imma gonna-" He then slipped on some oil, causing him to spin around and fall off the huge toy table. "UWAH!"

Toad and Toadette blinked as they felt the huge crash that occurred to Wario, the two looking at each other. Toad was about to make a dumb joke regarding Wario when Toadette's stomach grumbled again, this time louder.

"...maybe we should get some dough so we won't miss Wario!" Toad blurted his joke out as he laughed.

Toadette stared blankly at the mushroom boy for several seconds, before slapping him across the face for the terrible joke.


	4. Toad Questions His Cuteness

Ribbon Road was full of sprinkles as Toad and Toadette were playing around, when Toad paused as he turned to his pink clad girlfriend... best friend... wife... sister.

"Hey, uh, Toadette." Toad remarked as he rubbed his right arm with his left hand. "How come all we do are adorable, cuddly things?"

Toadette blinked as she held her hands together behind her back. "Whatever do you mean, Toad?"

"Well... I mean, we're basically children, at least by appearance, right?" Toad remarked as he rolled his hands around. "So that's why we end up doing adorable stuff. I just want to know the motive behind it!"

"...it's because we're innocent. At least, mostly." Toadette suggested as she smiled, going back to having fun with the ribbons.

Blinking as he watched his female partner enjoy herself, Toad nodded his head as he accepted this as an answer, enjoying the sprinkles for himself as he decided not to dwell too much on this predicament.


	5. Peach Likes Toys

"Man, I wish I could have all these toys here..." Princess Peach Toadstool remarked as she placed her hands on her hips. "They would be so fun to play with..."

Toad turned to Peach as he looked at her oddly. "Now why would you ask that? Don't you have all of these toys somewhere in your toy room in one of your many castles?"

"Yeah, well..." Peach trailed off as she rubbed the back of her head sheepishly with her right hand. "I want more. Like that one!" She then pointed at Toadette, who was holding a blossomed Cherrim doll.

"Aww! You're so cuddly and adorable! Like me!" Toadette squealed as she hugged the Cherrim doll, the toy based on the flower Pokemon making a cute squeal every time it got squeezed.

Toad squinted his eyes as he glanced at Peach. "Can't you just go catch a wild Cherrim for yourself?"

"No! I want that toy!" Peach snapped as she then tackled Toadette, with the two pink clad girls fighting over the Cherrim doll, Toadette kicking Peach's butt as she was very defensive over her doll.

Toad sighed as he sat down and pulled out a small red and white bag of popcorn, munching on it as he didn't bother to separate the two girls.


	6. Too Many Ribbons

Ribbon Road had ribbons of all different sorts falling everywhere from the sky, with the various racers present having to halt as they were trying to not get the ribbons in their faces.

"How can we race when these dumb ribbons keep falling in our face?" Toad remarked as he folded his arms in disgust.

"Try not to think about it." A yellow robed Shy Guy commented as he zipped past Toad, happy to have the advantage of the mask.

"Well you have a mask! How are we suppose to race!?" Toadette complained as she placed her hands on her face, sighing.

Dry Bowser, who was watching the race from one of the castle towers, had an umbrella in hand as he was munching on his corn flakes, enjoying this ribbon predicament.


	7. Universal Studios In The Ribbon Road

Ribbon Road was populated with all different toy products from various famous Universal Studios series, with both of the mushroom citizens recognized as Toad and Toadette recognizing this as they were chatting with each other while both were racing on the toy themed kingdom, being close to each other.

"There's a lot of universally accepted stuff here!" Toad remarked as he zipped in the Blue Falcon. "Think that they'll be extra characters?"

"Gosh, I hope!" Toadette remarked as she was riding on a Wiggler ATV. "I really wanna have a go at racing with Doc Brown! He's one of my idols!"

"Great Scott!" Doc Brown exclaimed as he watched the two Toads zip by him, not being aware that people beyond his realm knew of his existence.

* * *

A giant, very annoyed brown colored Tyrannosaurus Rex roared loudly as he chased after Mario and Bowser, with both of them running on foot as they were trying to escape the dinosaur's angry wrath.

"Agh, damn it!" Bowser cursed as he glanced back at the T-Rex. "Where did this thing come from?"

"I don't know-a, but I wish it went away-a!" Mario exclaimed as he chucked several red fireballs at velociraptors that popped up from behind the different colored toy blocks, with a Spinosaurus shaking poor Luigi around like a rag doll.

* * *

"Wahaha!" Wario laughed as he was zipping around backwards on the Ribbon Road, riding in the time traveling DeLorean. "Now it's time for me to give myself some money!"

Wario then disappeared, traveling back to 2001, where he appeared on the original Ribbon Road from the GameBoy Advance. He didn't have time to reminisce as he got smashed by several racers zipping by.

* * *

Princess Peach and Petey Piranha were looking into a Jaws toy set, with the two wondering where the toy shark was. Suddenly, the infamous JAWS theme began playing, with Peach screaming in horror as she jumped into Petey's leafy arms, the mutated piranha plant gawking as they noticed a shark fin surfing along the blue ribbon road.

"Bad shark... please go!" Peach stated as she trembled.

It was then that a toy version of Bruce The Shark appeared, with Princess Peach farting and wetting herself as she began crying.

Feeling disgusted by Peach letting loose her bodily functions, Petey chuckled the messy, bawling blonde human princess at the shark, who in turn began shaking Peach around like a rag doll. Hmm, familiar...

* * *

Dry Bowser was trying to fix up one of the messed up toy towers in the toy kingdom of the Ribbon Road, when there was a sudden violent shock wave across the table. "Earthquake!"

Everyone screamed as they began panicking, the entire toy room collapsing as the table broke apart, with the ribbon roads themselves ripping as Dry Bowser was broken up into a pile of bones, causing him to fall through the opened cracks.

* * *

Despicable Me minions were running around the Ribbon Road as they were causing quite a panic, with all the Mii racers forced to flee as they just did not stop, being a bigger menace than the actual race course itself.

* * *

"Hey hey!" Woody Woodpecker exclaimed as he obnoxiously laughed, popping up all over the Ribbon Road as he was annoying Waluigi, who had set up one of his many taco stands around in the toy land.

"Wah... why did I ask Universal to sponsor me again...?' Waluigi groaned as he was then slammed in the face several times by a wooden mallet from Woody, who was enjoying this way too much.


	8. It's A Ribbon Road After All

The Ribbon Road had all of the toys singing 'It's A Small World After All', which in turn annoyed poor old Toadsworth as he covered the places on his head where his ears would be, with Toad and Toadette singing along.

"Argh! How can you like this song!?" Toadsworth remarked as he turned to the much younger Toads. "It's so ear etching! It's blasphemy! It stinks!"

"It's adorable, like us!" Toadette piped as she twirled around, clapping her hands to the beat of the infamous Disney song.

"And it makes anyone who sings it feel like kids again!" Toad added as he bounced in synchronization with the song.

Toadsworth closed his eyes as he groaned, with Toad and Toadette continuing to sing joyfully.


	9. Splat Paint Ribbon Roads

"Huh. You wonder how they managed to get the different ribbons for the road?" A yellow robed Shy Guy asked a yellow colored Yoshi. "I'm just curious. Ha ha."

"Beats me, freak. Maybe they used lots and lots of crayons!" The yellow Yoshi replied.

The yellow Shy Guy rubbed the back of his head with his right hand. "Crayon, huh... wonder how big the crayon must be."

It was then that several toy biplanes flew by, with them spilling paint down on the ribbon roads, changing their colors as they now had splats of different colors on them, the two yellow creatures looking at each other as they were quite surprise.

"I guess it wasn't crayon at all!" The yellow Yoshi exclaimed while flailing his arms, with the yellow Shy Guy gasping as his white mask fell off.


	10. Don't Mess With Toad

"Uhhh..." Mario remarked as he looked oddly at Toad, who had colorful ribbons all over him. "Toad, any story to these ribbons covering you?"

"Yeah! To celebrate the Ribbon Road!" Toad stated as he twirled around, looking adorable and elegant. "Aren't I just a cutie?"

"...That's not the word I would describe ya." Mario stated as he adjusted his red cap.

"Oh my!" Toadette exclaimed as she blushed, placing her hands on her face. "Toad looks... even cuter than he already does!"

"But he doesn't look that-a cute-a, though." Mario stated as he moved his hands around. "He just looks as stupid as he always does."

Toad and Toadette glared at Mario as the red capped Italian human plumber was suddenly attacked by various different colored Toads, who all rained fury on him, making him squeal in pain. Oh, poor naive Mario. Mamma mia indeed.


	11. Toad Gets Injured Severely

"You know what, sis?" Toad remarked as he was riding the yellow ribbon circling around the Ribbon Road, sliding down it.

"What?" Toadette remarked as she twirled around in the ribbon, having style and grace.

"I'm bored of this place! Can't we add anything special to it?" Toad commented as he clenched his fists.

Toadette stopped spinning as she tried to maintain her balance. "Well, what do you suggest we add on to it?" She responded, murmuring at Toad.

"Hmm..." Toad remarked as he tried to think, when he went right off the ribbon, screaming as he flailed his arms, hitting the wooden floor below. "Oww! Well, at least I landed on a surface..."

Toad then got stepped on by giant feet, from the little kids running around in The Room that the Ribbon Road was located in. Toadette watched in horror as Toad cried out in pain.


	12. Can Mushrooms Eat Ribbons?

"Hey Toad, how many ribbons have you eaten?" A Goomba asked Toad. "I'm just curious and all... ha ha!"

"...How many ribbons? Have I eaten?" Toad gawked as he squinted his eyes at Goomba. "Have you been sniffing up on strange shrooms? You can't eat ribbons, you dumb fungi!"

"Maybe not you, but I can!" Toadette stated as she was sucking up some colorful ribbons as if they were spaghetti, burping afterwards as she then laughed. "Mmm, tastes sugary!"

Toad and the Goomba exchanged odd glances with each other as they watched Toadette hiccup, bouncing with each hiccup as she moved across the ribbon covered table of toys.


	13. Toadette Causes Confusion

"_It's called a road, it's called the Ribbon Road..._" Toad sung as he was driving around the bright and colorful Ribbon Road track, being way ahead in the league as all the other racers - all various different sized Miis - were way behind him, with Toad going so fast that he could eventually lap them. "_It is a road that you go..._"

"Why is he singing the Double Dash Rainbow Road song to the Ribbon Road?" Birdo remarked to Toadette as they were making new cute drawings of themselves to plaster the Ribbon Road with eventually.

"I don't know. I just let Toad do what he wants." Toadette remarked innocently as she brushed back her pink pigtails. "Just because he's my boyfriend, doesn't mean I should do everything he says. He might be the husband, but he's not the man in our relationship."

Birdo squinted her eyes at Toadette. "I thought you guys were brother and sister."

"...Nah, just good friends." Toadette shrugged as she frowned. "Or maybe twins, I don't know. I don't think we even have proper genders."

Birdo stared blankly at Toadette as she just waved her right hand in front of the pink clad mushroom girl, not willing to continue this discussion, as it was confusing both of them.


	14. Yoshi's Diced Game

"Yoshi's Diced Game? What kind of stupid game is that?" Yellow Toad asked Toadette in disbelief as the two were on the floor of the toy room the Ribbon Road was located at, looking at a box called 'Yoshi's Diced Game'.

"I dunno..." Toadette meekly shrugged. "Maybe it's a dice game that happens to star Yoshi?"

"Well... you want to give it a try?" Yellow Toad asked Toadette as a race was going on back at the actual Ribbon Road racetrack.

Toadette folded her arms as she blinked. "Well how do we know how to play it? It looks simple, but I bet it's complicated-"

"Hey guys, I found it!" A huge green Yarn Yoshi exclaimed as he stomped over to the area the two smaller Toads were in, picking up the Yoshi's Diced Game box as he was surrounded by different colored Yarn Yoshis.

Yellow Toad and Toadette groaned as they were both squashed, feeling pain as they tried to get back up, but couldn't.

* * *

"Time to get this party zappin'!" Lakithunder exclaimed as he turned on the electricity at his power plant in the Ribbon Road, only to cause all the lights in the room to go dark as he winced. "Whoops... didn't mean for that to happen!"

A huge crash was heard as the racers all collided into each other, due to not seeing a darn thing.

* * *

"How many presents does this kid have?" Petey Piranha asked Gooper Blooper as the two bosses were exploring the Ribbon Road, taking notice at all the presents lying around.

"Must be a spoiled brat. This kid didn't even open half of these presents," Gooper Blooper pointed out, with a random rainbow colored present box landing on him and Petey.

* * *

Dry Bowser was trying to place several of the crayons back up as a way to set them up like pillars, with Waluigi laughing at him. "What's so funny, lanky arms?"

"Just seeing you being reduced to picking up colorful things!" Waluigi chortled as, typically, he was selling tacos.

Dry Bowser growled as he tried to resist the urge to punch Waluigi, only for the green crayon he picked up to fall on him, due to Luigi zipping by in his green Mercedes car, who apologized as he went off the track.


	15. Lost In Ribbon Thought

"So, which direction do we go in?" Toadette asked Captain Toad as the two were trying to find their way back to the Ribbon Road, getting lost at the Moonview Highway.

"No idea... I should have listened to Toadsworth when he was mumbling about all the different, secret paths..." Captain Toad sighed as he had a map in his hands, with it getting darker on the forest portion of the highway racecourse.

_"All right, Captain, listen closely to me. I know you rather go on your feet than in a vehicle, but there's plenty of nooks and crannies here that you should take knowledge!" Toadsworth exclaimed as he had a chalkboard that detailed the entire Ribbon Road racecourse._

_Captain Toad was too busy playing around with the ribbons while Toadette farted a storm in her treasure tracker outfit due to eating an old can of beans she found in one of the ribbons, constantly fanning the air as she smiled while embarrassed, the other Toads either disgusted or excited by her gassy bouts of flatulence while they were trying to listen to Toadsworth._

"Me too..." Toadette stated after the flashback ended, blushing as she pushed back her pink pigtails. "Oh, if only I didn't love farting so much. It's a good thing I always have a large case of diapers with me." She admitted, breaking wind once more.

"That's great to know cause I love farting and pooping my pants too, but golly, I just wonder if Toadsworth is mocking us for not paying attention..." Captain Toad stated as he looked at a lone yellow ribbon he happened to have collected while being at the ribbon infested racetrack.

On the note of the Ribbon Road, Toadsworth was there, instructing another batch of generic Toads on where to look out for the hidden parts of the toy kingdom.

* * *

Lady Palutena farted as she and the other Cute Toot House were racing around the Ribbon Road, with Lakithunder selling his electrical power as he watched them zip by in the toy themed racetrack.

"These guys really know how to be positively energetic!" Lakithunder exclaimed as he watched Toadette zip away with a Golden Mushroom.

"Ugh, please don't." A Sumo Bro commented as he was making quakes to summon sparks for the power plant.

"What? I can't make puns, but everyone else can sparking can!?" Lakithunder exclaimed as Tiny Kong farted a bob-omb out at Ness, who flailed his arms about as Fox McCloud chucked several green Koopa Troopa shells at Toon Link, who blocked them with a trio of yellow bananas.

"It's not so much that as it is that you're obnoxious about it." Dry Bowser pointed out as he was placing up new colorful banners.

"Me, being obnoxious!? Ha!" Lakithunder watched as Aria Meloetta used her psychic to send a spiny winged blue shell at Doc Brown, who blocked it with a super horn. "The only thing that's ob or noxious is why no one is coming over here to appreciate my wares!"


End file.
